The girl i want to date is intelligent and funny.
Generally when you just hook up with someone, you get along with them well enough and find them pleasant to be around, but, speaking only for myself, you just know that there are larger compatibility issues that would prevent a relationship from thriving.
These issues could be practical, such as living very far away or working odd hours, or they could be personal, such as knowing the other person has an incompatible set of life goals she may want to be a world traveler, you may want to settle down. The girl I want to date has a vagina and a brain, the girl I want to hook up with must only need the former.
The first one I think about while masturbating. The second one I think about while masturbating, and then feel bad about it. Hookups tend to be based on aesthetics and sexual chemistry alone.
I had sex with a lot of women who were absolutely not my type vastly different interests, beliefs, etc and it was purely about the physical. If a girl took an emotional shine to me it was a turnoff.
I was basically substituting self-worth for sex and it worked in the short-term. Every new attractive hookup was an affirmation of self, and my batting average was high. Probably a self-esteem thing too. Date material on the other hand, insofar as my subjective notion of it applies, is a girl who is creative, intelligent, fun, sweet, interesting, etc — all the things my girlfriend is.
I want to date the girl my mom would be proud of.
I want to fuck the girl my mom would be appalled at. As men, we have two very distinct sets of standards. Want my cock tonight? However, dating means commitment. Dating carries a tremendous opportunity cost for the sexually active single male.
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You are throwing away an unknown amount of pussy, of unknown quality. So if a man can find sexual satisfaction while single, the cost-benefit analysis of a relationship is pretty uneven.
In order for the percieved benefits to outweigh the percieved costs, the girl in question needs to be an absolute no-brainer. Physical attractiveness, intelligence, sense of humor, core values, etc.
Sexual compatibilitly is huge, too. Both are willing to sleep with us, only one is worth holding an actual conversation with. If you put out but get rejected, youre Funny answers to perks of hookup you likely annoying, or just to easy to pass up. I classify attractiveness into two categories: If a girl is beautiful determined by shape of the body, face, etc. Before I got married, I rarely found a girl that I respected enough to want to date.
This has a lot to do with intelligence, hobbies, and ambition. I welcome sex early and often… And any girl I am with should at least have the potential to be a romantic partner.
The best way to avoid becoming a hookup is to not sleep with the guy unless he makes a bit of a commitment.
They need only bear the minimum of desirable traits, and then only in a very sparse amount. Average looking and not overweight? Not a completely unforgivable cunt?
More specific to the FWB-type relationship. I think it differs from person to person. This is for a lot of reasons. In order to hook up with someone I really just need to be attracted to them at that moment, and it really only needs to be physical attraction.
The difference is lots of anal and ATM.